Breaking Away from Social Conditioning

Walking Away From a Potentially Difficult Client | Remodeling

I have learnt that people asking me questions was more out of curiosity and less out of care.

I have learnt that no matter what I reply, they would stick to their judgement of me unless they choose to broaden their perspective.

I learnt that what they thought about me doesn't matter

What I think about me, however, does matter

I don't need to seek approval or approve

I need to seek acceptance of me by myself.

Nobody is going to think better or worse of me.

And the world will move on regardless of whether I follow my dreams or stick to comfort zones.

I am not the center of the universe and there is no spotlight on me deeply analyzing my every move.

Its all in my overthinking mind

Anxiety, perfectionism, being an obsessive control freak, fear of rejection, fear of failure, constant seeking of external validation, is a by product of heavily and unnecessarily processing those opinions of the world, that need to be taken lightly with a pinch of dust.

And I am going to shift away from my social conditioning and recondition myself to be the person I want me to be.

It might take days, weeks, months or years but I will persevere, uncover and transform myself into the person I am authentically meant to be.

"Your first thought shows your social conditioning
your second thought shows your innate nature
your first action shows your character"

Patterns can be rewired
Thoughts can be redirected
Actions can be reformed
Character can be renewed.

That's exactly what I'm doing.

Karmic Forces (2) - Perspective

This is the second part in a 6 part fictional story series. Everything in this story is purely imaginary with inspirations from real life. Any resemblance to any person or occasion in real life is completely coincidental. 2. Perspective Miraa got up from the bathroom floor, disoriented. She heard her mother bang on the room's door, shouting, "Miraa, what do you want for breakfast? When is your next class?" . Relieved that her mother had not sensed her internal battle in the bathroom, Miraa got out of the bathroom, went to the her room's door and tried to reply as calmly as possible, " Anything but Upma ma! My next class is at 12!" . She hadn't done a good job of covering up her weak, broken voice, since pat came the next interrogation, " Your voice is low dear.. what happened? Are you okay? Was it another nightmare?" . Miraa smiled, understanding her mom's concern. She had had nightmares of her abuser chasing her, finding her, torturing he...

Karmic Forces (1) - Conversations

This is the first part in a 6 part fictional story series. Everything in this story is purely imaginary with inspirations from real life. Any resemblances to any person or occasion in real life is completely coincidental. 1. Conversations Tired out by the activities of the day, Miraa changed into her loose yellow t shirt and black pants, turned on the AC, curled up in her bed, comforter carelessly strewn over her feet, nose hooked inside a book, eyes and mind engrossed in its contents. She was a 20 year old college goer, with small, brown eyes, a rather flat nose, a set of imperfect, yellowish, crooked teeth and with wavy, shoulder-length, black hair now tied in a characteristic bun, with a milky complexion. As she continued reading, a chill went down her spine. The chill had nothing to do with the atmosphere provided by the air conditioner nor with the gripping story of the book. A feeling of being watched, almost that of being quietly examined, suddenly made her feel vulne...

An Apology to My Inner Critic

Dear Inner Critic, It feels weird to call you dear when I've been antagonizing you my entire life; when in fact any motivational video that I've come across has only lectured me to ignore you and prove you wrong. I loved ignoring you because you just seem to pop out of nowhere to be my personalized buzz kill. I loved proving you wrong because it weirdly boosts my ego, for me to tell "I told you I was right" to a voice that always tells me this dialog (mini revenge). But you know what, Covid has hit the world and locked me up in self isolation and I fell into the world of personal development ( because why not? ). And I have made amazing progress to say the least but I seem to be having a major stumbling point when it comes to "compassion" - the art of having concern for the misfortune of others and being willing to look beyond their flaws - with people who I have felt hurt by ( obviously including you ). I mean, I can have compassion for people who...

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